Just say no to polygamy legislation

Just say no to polygamy legislation

Because of its oddball liquor laws, faux morality stances, and a lack of diversity that makes the state compare favorably to a bologna sandwich with mayo on white bread, Utah is already pretty much a laughingstock.

Oh, there are plenty of pretty rocks and mountains and lakes and such and the climate isn’t too awful, unless you live in that hell-hole they call the Uintah basin where God still holds a grudge.

But things are about to go white-hot weird as the legislature toys with the idea of decriminalizing polygamy from a felony offense to an infraction, about the same as a traffic ticket in legalese.

Theocracy, you might say?

It’s all on the up-and-up, right, as a matter of allowing people complete freedom, right?

Don’t give me that “civil liberties” business. We all know just how accepting Utah was to the notion of same-sex marriage. There isn’t a drop of true libertarianism in the whole damned state; otherwise, Utah would have been a leader, not a poor follower, in the legalization of cannabis, not only for medicinal purposes but for recreational uses as well.

Utah wouldn’t have stood so tall in opposition to same-sex marriage if it was truly libertarian.

And the flameout legislation that resulted in a food tax hike that the legislature had to overturn quickly because the voters wanted to storm the capitol with torches and pitchforks would never have passed in the first place if libertarianism held a place here.

This business about polygamy is really nothing new.

Back when the territory was desperately seeking statehood, a deal was struck that allowed Utah to join the Union if it gave up polygamy. The church disavowed the practice in 1890, but the funny thing is that it was one of those nudge-and-a-wink deals where the cops turned a blind eye for generations.

The result was disastrous.

Women were forced into plural marriages as a way to guarantee their eternal salvation.

Fraud became a tool of the polygamists — particularly the fundamentalist sects that sprouted and held true to the origins of the religion — as they found newer and better ways to weasel welfare money from the government.

And most tragically, it opened the doors to the sexual abuse of innocent little girls, many of whom were forced into plural marriages as soon as they became fertile. They became victims of physical, emotional, spiritual, and sexual abuse in the hidden villages of Hildale, Colorado City, and the other little enclaves where these perverts hide from the law.

In fact, it doesn’t take a long memory to remember that the super-perv in charge of the FLDS, Warren Jeffs, is serving life-plus in a Texas prison for sexually abusing two of his underage wives.

Look, I really don’t care who anybody has sex with as long as they are consenting adults. I don’t care how many partners you may have. I don’t care if you are celibate. I don’t care what sexual activities you participate in as long as everybody involved is of legal age and consents of their own free will.

And that is part of the problem: Polygamy was part of early church doctrine.

But when it became clear that Utah would not receive the benefits of statehood without condemning the practice, church president Wilford Woodruff had a convenient revelation on the night of Sept. 23, 1890. Woodruff said that God told him the church should abandon the practice of plural marriage.

It saved face and gave statehood to Utah, and all was good, even though plural marriages continued in secrecy for another 14 years before — I guess — God told then-church president Joseph Fielding Smith that he really meant what he said. On April 6, 1904, Smith issued a second proclamation banning plural marriage.

The declaration had no teeth.

In fact, two years later, Smith was charged and pleaded guilty to unlawful cohabitation with four women in addition to his wife. He paid a $300 fine, the maximum penalty permitted under the law.

So much for practicing what you preach.

I have met a number of women from polygamist cults.

I have heard horror stories of them being locked away to repent, beaten into submission when they dared oppose being placed in a plural marriage, and stripped of all dignity and rights by a culture that is arguably the most repressive in the United States.

We’ve all seen them in our stores and, I am sure, all wondered if that little baby being pushed around in a stroller at Costco or Wal-Mart is a younger sibling or child of the little girl pushing the stroller.

The cops don’t want to deal with it all and are just as likely to return a runaway minor girl to her family rather than turn her over to child protective services when she tries to escape one of these arranged marriages.

Why?

They know that the case will almost never go to court, that the pervy old men will never face charges, and that it is state policy to turn a blind eye to prosecuting the state’s bigamy laws.

I’ve seen the aftermath and fallout from this culture. I’ve seen the mental and physical damage done to these women who, by the accident of birth, became entangled in these cultures.

We have seen how the fundamentalists have taken it to the extreme of employing underage children to work in their fields, shops, and communities in violation of state and federal laws.

And we have seen the LDS Church tiptoe around this issue, saying from one side of its mouth how it condemns plural marriage while at the same time instructing how marriages sealed in a temple result in eternal marriage, regardless of how many wives a man may be sealed to along life’s path.

The inequity here, of course, is that women are still objectified. They are still officially considered possessions of their husbands, not only here on Earth but in the afterlife where she would presumably share her husband with each wife he was sealed to in marriage.

This is without question another bit of Utah’s theocracy in action despite any denials you may get from the church or its spokesmen.

And I would not be surprised if soon after such a law is adopted by our legislature somebody in the church hierarchy has another convenient revelation that reinstates polygamy as a key to eternal salvation.

That’s why given the context and history of polygamy, abuses, fraud, and inherent dangers we cannot understand how any clear-thinking individual could possibly endorse such a ridiculous idea.

But then again, this is Utah.

The viewpoints expressed above are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of The Independent.

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