pinion and cartoon about tranquility

Written by Stephen Bowers

How are things where you are? I hope they are “tranquil.”

The guy who replaced the Administration’s press secretary just proved the old maxim that “no matter how bad things are, they can get worse.” The guy made Carney look smart by comparison. Was I on drugs, or did the replacement say the world was “tranquil” or getting more “tranquil?” Which world could he be referring to?

Speaking of comparisons, someone on Fox news said Obama is a much worse Prez than Jimmy Carter. The evidence for this assertion was that Carter had started building the military after his attempts at foreign diplomacy in the Middle East had failed miserably. He realized that a position of strength is a superior way of dealing with lawless thugs. Carter appears Einsteinian when standing next to the village lay-about idiot lolling in his favorite hammock.

I think it was Megyn (what has she done to her hair?) Kelly who made the comparison (in her typical subtle sledgehammer style). It had me laughing — almost — had it not been for her intro about all the things that had gone wrong in the World (at least in the Middle East) in the last few days/hours, all of which Obama is oblivious about or denying. Or claiming his own personal efforts have actually improved said horrific conditions.

Thinking back on J. Carter, it seemed Kelly had gone pretty easy on Obama. The comparison should have included that while Carter was a standard egg-head liberal (1. denying the existence of evil, 2. tendency of putting one’s head in the sand at oddly inappropriate times, 3. aw, this could take forever…) and working from the disadvantage inherent in notions held by liberals, he did possess a mind, which, when freed from the silly unfounded prejudices so typical of old-fashioned liberals, sometimes functioned. You have to remember — Carter’s work experience before the Democrats nominated him for the presidency was not limited to peanut farming (which would automatically preclude you from possibly being a dummy if not for the prevalence of agricultural subsidies). Oh, no! The guy was an engineer. Remember? I think he was an atomic sub commander! So, he was neither congenitally or socially/environmentally conditioned to be an idiot. Of course, for the moment we will ignore Billy, his brother, and his oblivious (possibly inherited or DNA-embedded) tendency toward Moronsville. It may have been a stroke of genius when Billy made a financial killing off Gaddafi when he registered as Libya’s agent in the good ole’ USA, but maybe it was Jimmy’s idea, so… 

Anyway, when Jimmy saw how dealing from weakness didn’t work, he was smart enough to begin the military buildup Reagan finished. Which allows us to infer Carter was like-minded, if only for a brief, shining moment, with Reagan. Only a moment’s brilliance trumps none whatsoever. Give credit where it is due.

So as Obama’s giant intellect and perspicacity fade, we are now able to see the community organizer, first Affirmative Action president for what he is: Not much.

And while Chicagoans (a city renowned for its gun laws) enjoyed a record number of shootings and slayings over the Fourth (apparently, shootings are a time-honored Fourth of July tradition in the Windy City), the bodies of drowned children are floating up onto the shores of the Rio Grande, and ISIS (or the New Caliphate) is raping and beheading its way through the Christian population of the Free Iraq we bled and paid for, I for one take comfort knowing our Prez is sending out mind-waves like the true Jedi he is, making the world a more “tranquil” place for us all; unless you happen to be a Christian in Iraq.

Although things are far from “tranquil” for most of us, things are looking up in the oddest small places. I actually saw that guy on MSNBC (or somewhere; he briefly appeared as I was switching over to the All-Star Game Preview Show, which, apparently, starts about a decade before the actual game, but which, with all the highlights, is fun to watch) who was questioning some minor functionary in the Administration about some scandal or another. I forget the guy’s name. He’s white (which, according to Eric Holder, means he is a racist), annoying, has lips that look like a case of Botox injection gone bad and, like a military clock that has stopped, had finally gotten it right. He was questioning some soulless-looking guy (like that IRS clown who was grilled by Trey Gowdy, my nomination for President, who could give Megyn Kelly a few lessons on how to wield the sledgehammer during cross-examination). Old Soulless gave the usual roundabout non sequitur, but hit a wall when Botox asked the question again. I couldn’t believe my eyes or ears! I was thrilled. If the talking heads on MSNBC are waking from their decades-long slumber, maybe there is hope.  

The talking heads are the ones who don’t even notice the missiles dropping on Israel like rain or big hailstones. But they do notice when Israel even thinks about retaliating. But if they are waking, maybe there is hope.

Hope, maybe, but not “tranquility.” Two different things.

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