Surviving a sociopathic or pathological liar
By Bill Kahn
Unlike their killer’s namesake, who mangles bodies, these types of liars mangle minds. They can do it to your mind unless you know what to look for.
Sociopathic and pathological liars come in all flavors: financial, religious, political, and social varieties. Their goal is deception in order to gain money or power. They are selling “themselves” disguised as problem solvers. They’re much like the snake-oil salesman of the 19th century, drawing people who never realize they’re being used into their fold by mind manipulation.
They’re far worse than scammers, con artists, or thieves can ever be. They may be great speakers and respectable in appearance as executives, politicians, salespeople, associates, or friends. They can severely impact your family, health, pocketbook, job, beliefs, and even your reputation, often without you ever knowing it.
Bernie Madoff was a financial pathological liar, using his Ponzi pyramid scheme as his snake oil. He started by convincing his close friends that they would become richer by following him. He then used those friends to develop a network, eventually stealing $64 billion. That’s the equivalent of stealing $200 from every person in the USA. He impacted life savings and caused some to commit suicide.
A sociopathic liar is even more devastating, as illustrated by The People’s Temple. It was formed by Jim Jones, practicing what he called “Apostolic Socialism.” It was started in 1955 and ended in 1978 at the Jonestown mass suicide of 909 individuals.
We all lie to one extent or another. It’s probably an evolutionary trait necessary for survival. Dr. Robert Feldman, professor of psychological and brain sciences at the University of Massachusetts, says it’s part and parcel of everyday life. Fortunately, some type lies are harmless. The “white liar” might shield someone from what could be hurtful” “I love the color of your house.” The “occasional liar” seldom lies but eventually admits to it: “I caught a fish this big.”
Pathological and sociopathic liars probably start off as compulsive liars who continually lie from sheer habit; it’s their normal manner of responding. They bend the truth; regardless of how small or large the question, telling the truth doesn’t feel right.
They may then develop into pathological and sociopathic liars with some common characteristics: superficial charm, a grandiose sense of self worth, a lack of remorse or empathy, impulsiveness, rejection of responsibility, and exaggerated sexual behavior.
Psychologist Sheena R. Harris stated that pathological liars sometimes believe their own lies while compulsive liars see their lies as clearly untrue but can’t help themselves.
Dr. Seth Meyers assessed a sociopathic liar as one who emotionally destroys those who are close because they don’t have a moral anchor or a deep sense of social obligations to others.
The differences are even more stark. The pathological liar plans out his or her attack secretly and fantasizes about the plan in detail before committing it, much like a seasoned crook; it’s all about the plan and result. In contrast, the sociopathic liar is disorganized, makes spur-of-the-moment decisions, and is narcissistic, prone to excessive boasting, and at the center of his or her own universe, expecting everyone to gravitate around his or her needs to get his or her own way.
Emotionally, the pathological liar is manipulative, has poor behavioral control and is shallow and heartless with a parasitic lifestyle. The sociopathic liar has a deprecating attitude toward the opposite sex, can’t empathize with others, has difficulty feeling remorse, lacks impulse control, and makes extreme responses to normal situations. When this type liar is exposed, he or she will often go into an attack mode and try to impeach credibility and competence or use humor or sarcasm to deflect a subject.
Who of our recent presidents resembles each class of liar? An example of a compulsive liar would be Bill Clinton (similar to other politicians) while Richard Nixon and Lyndon Johnson fit the pathological liar category. Donald Trump would be classed as a sociopathic liar.
In their early stages, those characteristic traits may not be strong enough to identify where a person is headed. However, there are four other traits to look for which are easily identified: what they say, how they say it, and what their face and body reveal.
Sociopathic and pathological liars’ objective is to manipulate your mind so that you become part of their world. Believing in them can be an unforgiving trap.
Bill Kahn teaches about scams and frauds at stopthescam.org.
….. Donald Trump would be classed as a sociopathic liar …..
Seems a confident diagnosis. Care to list a few of his lies? Let’s agree, shall we, that five might be a fair sample?
Not holding my breath, though.
Sincerely – Brian.·.