Movie Review: “You Hurt My Feelings”

MOVIE REVIEW: YOU HURT MY FEELINGS (R)

– By Adam Mast –

“You Hurt My Feelings” transcends its sitcom-level concept thanks mostly to wonderful performances and delicate direction.

Nicole Holfcener is a wonderful writer and while she’s been behind a handful of terrific (mostly smaller) films through the years as a writer and or director– “Please Give, “Enough Said,” “Friends With Money,” “Can You Ever Forgive Me?,” and “The Last Duel” among them–she’s still a talent that has remained relatively under the radar. That said, maybe that’s a good thing because I’d much rather see her spearhead little charmers like “You Hurt My Feelings” as opposed to massive tentpoles that we’re used to seeing from the likes of Marvel and James Cameron. Not that I have anything against those movies but it’s nice to have some balance in the cinematic force, and that’s where intimate storytellers like Holfcener come in.

In “You Hurt My Feelings” the forever-endearing Julia Louis-Dreyfus is novelist, Beth, a slightly uppity middle-aged woman at a professional crossroads who is emotionally knocked for a loop when she overhears her doting middle-aged therapist husband, Don (played by a wonderfully understated Tobias Menzies), sharing his true feelings on her latest book with a friend. This, shortly after telling her how much he enjoyed reading it. Confused and upset by this seemingly out-of-leftfield betrayal, Beth does everything she can to process her feelings on the matter. Everything, of course, but telling her husband that she overheard what he said.

“You Hurt My Feelings” takes what might otherwise be typical sitcom fodder and rings truth and honesty out of it. And in fact, while the whole conceit at the heart of this movie seems simple and even a little immature, Holfcener delicately brings a certain level of complexity to the proceedings. After all, Beth and Don have been together for many years, so the fate of their entire marriage won’t be relegated to something as seemingly trivial as this, will it? Well, let’s just say that the overall outcome here isn’t as important as the journey to that outcome.

Watching a pro like Dryefus navigate this kind of playful terrain is quite a joy. Likewise, a lesser-known Menzies (who is mostly known for his work in t.v. shows like “The Terror” and “The Crown”) complements the “Seinfeld” veteran in a really lovely way. And in fact, as a pair, these two performers have terrific onscreen chemistry, even when they’re in the cusp of contention.

Beth and Don certainly have their little quirks but one of the things that I really enjoyed most about this movie is how lived in these characters feel and that’s a testament to both Dreyfuss’s and Menzies’s skills and natural ability as performers, but it’s also a testament to Holfcener and her adept ability to create the right environment for her leads to play in. Further still, Beth and Don are so loving, so misunderstood, and so seemingly defeated in their own ways, that throughout the film, I sort of found myself changing sides.

While some might dismiss “You Hurt My Feelings” as a disposable high-concept romantic comedy that makes a big deal out of something that really isn’t that big of a deal in the first place,  I found it refreshingly grounded and admired that it resists the temptation to go all showy and broad with its comical strokes. This isn’t to say that  “You Hurt My Feelings” reinvents the wheel, by any means,  but ultimately, it has quite a bit to say about relationships and our inability to properly communicate with one another even when we think we know each other inside and out. Most importantly, though, it’s a sweet little gem of a character-driven comedy that never outstays its welcome.

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