Kill ‘em With Kindness and Move Into the Light

Kill ‘em with kindness and move into the light

There’s a darkness that has enveloped us all.

No matter how we try to disguise it, we are shrouded in fear and anger, fighting our inner demons, dealing with those that infect others.

This is an unprecedented business we are dealing with here, circumstances that are beyond our experience that test the limits of our rationale and patience.

There is righteous outrage generated because of our being hip-deep in ideology. There is a painful fear of an unknown path that is cluttered with landmines. There is anger that goes scattershot, picking off not only those responsible but the innocent as well. The innocent and the guilty in that matter remain at the center of a debate that has no agreeable conclusion, to be honest so everybody loses.

We are scarred mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually without a fix in sight so we lash out, often at those who deserve it least.

Sometime in the near future, when Covid-19 releases its grip, which it will, when the protests fade, which they will, when we reach a certain place called normalcy, whatever that may be, what will we be?

Pretty wrecked, I imagine.

I can guarantee we will be a global community afflicted with a full-on pandemic of PTSD. This trauma has already beaten down many who may not emerge as the fully robust, happy, shiny people they once were. We will have carryover fear. We didn’t see this thing coming, we had no warning, we had no point of reference. We floundered. We are still floundering as we argue amongst ourselves, even at this point, over the efficacy of wearing masks and washing our hands, whether we should still practice social distancing, whether we should send our children back to the classroom.

God, we just wish everything was normal again, or as close to what we once perceived as normal.

So we vent those frustrations, our anger, our fear into actions that are totally unproductive by humiliating and degrading each other and practicing that “what-about-ism” game of justifying bad behavior by comparing it with other perceived bad behavior because, let’s face it, it simply isn’t the way we would behave and we are always right.

Those who are the peacemakers, the calm, the kind who try to reason with others, try to talk them in from the ledge, try to point out that the ego inflation that causes us to level blame at everybody else, are the real heroes. The lesson here, by the way, is to never mistake kindness for weakness. It takes more inner strength, more patience, more commitment, integrity, and intellect to operate from kindness than anger.

That doesn’t mean you should roll over or compromise your standards, it just means you are coming from a righteous place.

I don’t want to get into the politics of all of this because, well, I just don’t have the heart or desire to bang my head against that wall right now. Maybe tomorrow, but not right now. I also don’t want to say both sides are equally to blame because I don’t believe that and besides, that is nothing but a lazy copout, a feeble attempt at appeasement. But, at this point, it is futile to engage anybody on a political issue because there is no civil discourse, no understanding of how from disparate extremes, solutions are born. Silence is a better option, living with grace is a better example. Any fool can prove their cerebral deficiencies by simply opening their mouth. The wiser fool keeps his or hers shut and leaves the rest of us to wonder.

For the record, we’ve been on this path into the darkness for some time now. Disease and prejudice launched us onto a straighter, more direct trajectory into the heart of discontent and it ain’t pretty.

How many times have you wasted your precious time on involving yourself in some fruitless social media war? That battlefield is pretty scarred, littered with the skeletons of friendships broken because somebody felt like they just had to have the last word, no matter how mean-spirited it may have been. The one-upmanship battles are futile and, seriously, you are not as clever as you think. Besides, do you really take enjoyment from crushing the soul of somebody who once had a place in your heart?

Seek truth. It’s out there, it truly is. I know it takes some effort, but you can find it if you strip back the layers of deceit. I understand your frustrations with the shallowness of what passes for news all too often. But, sift through the infotainer’s, who shout with wide-eyed energy into your television screen. I’ve audited a lot of the Big Three lately – MSNBC, Fox, CNN – and to be honest, there are more so-called analysts than there are genuine newsies on the air. But, if you are selective, you won’t see so many dead horses being beaten or the massive faux outrage. Yes, there is plenty to be outraged about right now, but it is ratcheted up disproportionately by those eager to turn a buck or two from advertisers.

Do some fact-checking. I cannot count how many times I have seen the two presidential contenders smashed by what seem like devastating stories and videos, only to do a little research and discover that they never really said what was attributed to them and that an awful lot of those videos you are seeing are blatant hack jobs by whacks with some video editing tools and skills. When you see something posted, go to the source. See who published it. You might be interested in learning that many of the competing “news” sources being quoted these days are bait-click companies that publish a far-right conservative site and far-left liberal site, both filled with lies and innuendo, geared to double-dipping and raking in the dough from unsuspecting saps from both sides who take it as gospel. The only higher purpose they hold to is greater profits. Truth? It’s an uncomfortable commodity.

Bury those preconceived notions, whether rooted in a particular ideology, culture, or bias. Eliminate stereotypes of all kinds. They are gross misrepresentations of our brothers and sisters based on centuries of hate, suspicion, and misunderstanding.

And, don’t be afraid to pose questions. While it’s not OK to be a cynic, a little skepticism never hurt anybody.

As budding news reporting students, we were taught to dig into everything as deeply as possible. “If your mother says she loves you, get a second source,” our mentors told us.

Most importantly, seek the lightness. Do not be afraid to break from anger and despair. We spend too much time regretting yesterday and worrying about tomorrow rather than taking care of today.

We’re going to make it. I am confident.

So, when confronted with the negativity that is thick in our nostrils, remember to kill ‘em with kindness.

It is, after all, the civil thing to do and much more effective…

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