CARTOON: ‘Affluenza Baby’

From cartoonist Clay Jones on “Affluenza Baby,” Ethan Couch’s drunken prepubescent antics, and why it’s great to live in America when you’re filthy stinking rich

One symptom that you might suffer from Affluenza is when mommy and daddy can purchase high-priced lawyers to help you squirm out of consequences of your bratty behavior.

Affluenza is when you are so rich, spoiled, and privileged that you cannot tell the difference between wrong and right. Apparently you suffered and were neglected by being raised in a prosperous and privileged family. I believe that is possible. Maybe Daddy Warbucks did drop the ball with you and today you feel you don’t have to pay for your mistakes, even when you harm and kill others. I think when that happens, it’s a good time for you to start learning the difference between right and wrong, learn some responsibility, and be held accountable for your actions. Hard Knocks University can be very educational and enlightening.

Ethan Couch is a spoiled white kid in Texas. Or he was in Texas before he went on the lam. Ethan’s father owns a sheet metal company with estimated yearly sales at $15 million. When little Ethan was 13, he drove himself to his fancy pants private school, and when the principal questioned it, his father threatened to purchase the school. In 2013, he was busted with alcohol and a naked 14-year-old girl in his pickup. Yeehaw! He got 12 hours of community service, alcohol classes, and probation.

Things for Little Privileged Ethan got much worse that same year. On June 15, 2013, he was witnessed on surveillance video stealing two cases of beer from a Wal-Mart, driving with seven passengers in his father’s sweet Ford F-150 pickup truck, and speeding (70 mph in a designated 40 mph zone). Three hours after the incident, he had a blood alcohol content of 0.24, three times the legal limit for adult drivers in Texas, and tested positive for Valium. Shortly afterward, he killed four pedestrians and seriously injured two others.

His defense attorneys hired a psychologist who testified in court that Ethan was a product of “Affluenza” and was unable to link his bad behavior with consequences because of his parents teaching him that wealth buys privilege. As a great example of wealth buying privilege, the judge went very light on Ethan and decided not to send him to prison.

Ethan was sentenced to ten years probation and sent to a rehab facility. and ordered not to drink.

Later in 2015, someone uploaded a video on Twitter which alleges Couch was drinking while playing beer pong. Since this is a direct violation of his probation, he could face ten years in prison. So Couch and his mommy went on the run. Today there is a manhunt for the Affluenza baby that involves the FBI and the U.S. Marshals. If you see him, you can claim the $5,000 reward for information on his whereabouts.

You have to ask yourself: If Ethan was poor and black would he have avoided prison time? Black kids are being shot just for being outside while being black, and Ethan is released after killing four people to go play beer pong. It’s a nice country to live in, especially if you’re the one percent.

claytoonz.com/2015/12/28/affluenza-baby