CARTOON: ‘Virginia Wee-wee and Hoo-haa Checker’

From cartoonist Clay Jones on “Virginia Wee-wee and Hoo-haa Checker,” the mark of the beast, and the proposed potty police

Mark Cole is a Republican representative to the Virginia House of Delegates. He represents parts of Spotsylvania County, Stafford County, and the city of Fredericksburg. This is the community I live in. We have a lot of insufferable, right-wing, intolerant, fundamentalist lunatics in this area. But damnit. All the other yahoos coordinated and got this one elected to public office. Suffice it to say, Cole is not representing my views.

Cole has a history of sponsoring legislation motivated by his paranoia. In 2010, he sponsored a bill that would ban the implantation of microchips into humans by their employers. He said, “There’s a prophecy in the Bible that says you’ll have to receive a mark, or you can neither buy nor sell things in end times, some people think these computer chips might be that mark.” Maybe someone should check Cole for the mark of the beast.

Now he’s worried about which bathroom transgender children will use. He has sponsored a bill that in part legislates the use of bathrooms based on “anatomical sex” in public schools. Cole has not explained how he envisions this law to work. How are school authorities supposed to determine the proper sex of their students? Who does it? How do they do it? Do they put an ad in the paper for a hoo-haa inspector? Will they reject applicants who drive creepy vans? Who the hell wants that job, I mean other than pedophiles? This is crap I don’t want to think about. Maybe our legislators should stop thinking about it too.

Thankfully, I don’t believe these questions will have to be answered since Virginia has a Democratic governor who is not a fundamentalist lunatic that fancies laws that bully children.

Cole says there are parents in his district concerned and worried about transgender children sharing a bathroom with their children. Tell those paranoid parents to instruct their children to use a stall. They still have those in school bathrooms, right? What bothers me more than transgender children are adults who want to check out their genitalia. Stop it.

When Cole isn’t fixated on the genitalia of schoolchildren, he’s sponsoring bills that support voter suppression, memorialize the U.S. Congress to repeal personal income taxes, and enact a national sales tax and another on the right to bear arms (which is already legal).

It’s bad enough students are confronted with bullying by fellow students. They don’t need adults to join in on the bullying.

claytoonz.com/2016/01/16/virginia-wee-wee-and-hoo-haa-checker