The lost art of letter writing
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about letters, thinking about how nice it is to get a letter when you open the mailbox rather than just junk mail and bills. How nice it is to know that someone was willing to take time out of their busy life, or even not busy life, to share their thoughts.
Actually, I’ve thought about this a lot over my life. I have to admit that I’m not the great letter writer myself. My dad was, however. While I lived in Alaska for 30 years, Dad was great about writing regularly to me. At that time, it was very meaningful to me given that I was somewhat stranded in Alaska while my family all resided in the Lower 48, as the contiguous states are called.
In fact, following Dad’s death in 2003, those letters have become even more precious to me. It’s a bit of him that I will always have with me to treasure. His words of encouragement and love to his far-distant daughter were well received as I made my way in the wilds of Alaska and particularly while working in the oil industry — a man’s world. They gave me strength to realize the assets I possessed that would help bolster me.
My mom was also a great letter writer. However, her letters and Dad’s letters are very different — as different as they were as people. I enjoy rereading their letters but have to say that Dad’s affect me most and make me reflect on who I am now versus who I was then. His letters were very personal and focused on me, rather than just talking about what he was doing, which was very important to my sense of worth during my time so far away from family when younger.
The power of letters came up again as I was reading a book containing columns written during author Liz Caile’s 20 years of writing for a small paper in Colorado near Boulder and later published in a book, “Liz Caile: A Life at Treeline.” She writes about an earlier time of innocence when mailboxes were not stuffed full of junk mail and the occasional letter graced the recipient and brought a smile.
Liz’s words are more eloquent than anything I could write, so I’ll let her say it. “Almost without exception, an incredible honesty and straight-forwardness goes with the handwritten letter. Though years and miles had almost obliterated a friendship, an old acquaintance’s core personality would jump out at me from a casual written communication I had saved. I could picture not only the face but the hopes and dreams, likes and dislikes of that person. I could also feel the strong will for friendship and connection in each and every letter I had saved.”
So Liz recognized how much these letter-writing friends savored the friendship they had with her and how much that meant to her. Liz also pointed out that writing a letter shows genuine generosity. It’s an act of sharing that has no equal among our other forms of communication. Perhaps now in our even more fast-paced world than when Liz was writing in the ’80s and ’90s, people feel that e-mail and tweets serve the same purpose, but I would argue they do not. It takes real allocation of time — real generosity — to care enough about someone to want to write to them and share your life, inquire about theirs, and let them know how important the relationship is.
Although I have written letters during my life, mostly to my dad, mom, husband and daughter Jennifer, I’ve not been good about doing it lately and need to spend more time dedicated to that. Being older makes me think about losing friends and loved ones and how important it is to let them know their importance in my life. However, with age, writing, as with all physical abilities, becomes more of an effort. So I’ve not been inclined to take up pen and paper lately. However, I believe the more I’m thinking about it means I will probably do so. I hope so. I also hope that others will give thought to the value that letter writing has and the love and generosity it reveals. Always good to let those who are important to you know how important they are!
The viewpoints expressed above are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of The Independent.
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