Written by Adam Mast
POLTERGEIST (PG-13)
They’re back…and they’re not as scary. Not as patient either. This is not for a lack of trying on the part of talented director Gil Kenan (who made the vastly superior “Monster House”), but in the end, it was probably too much to hope for that this re-imagining would measure up to the unforgettable original. And before anyone jumps down my throat for having the audacity to compare both films, may I remind you that they’re both called “Poltergeist.” They sort of beg comparison.
In this updating of a cinematic classic, a down-on-his-luck Eric Bowen (Sam Rockwell) moves his family into a new suburban home. His loving wife, Amy (Rosemarie DeWitt), offers her full support, but eldest daughter Kendra (Saxon Sharbino) isn’t at all happy with the move, and like a lot of rebellious teenagers, she makes her parents completely aware that she isn’t at all happy with the current situation.
After settling in to their new abode, young Griffin (Kyle Catlett) notices that his little sister Maddie (Kennedi Clements) is exhibiting strange behavior—lengthy conversations with her closet and extended chats with the family room television set, that sort of thing. Shortly thereafter, Griffin himself is witness to a couple of unsettling happenings that lead him to believe that the Bowen family’s new home is haunted. Sadly though, as is typical in films of this nature, the parents don’t want to listen to their child when he informs them something is terribly wrong. That is, until it’s too late.
Upon returning home from a local dinner party, Eric and Amy are shocked to discover that not only has Griffin been telling the truth, but Maddie has been abducted by ghostly residents. With nowhere to turn, the Bowens call upon cantankerous paranormal expert Carrigan Burke (Jared Harris) in an effort to retrieve their daughter from the clutches of a most terrifying supernatural presence.
As is completely evident by the plot description, this “Poltergeist” doesn’t change things up much in terms of story beats. There is certainly a digital facelift at play here. Not in terms of visual effects technology but rather in terms of content. This take on “Poltergeist” features cellphones, iPads, flatscreen televisions, drones, and other numerous contemporary gizmos that are on hand to remind audiences that this is, in fact, an updated version of “Poltergeist.” But aside from a nifty sequence in which a drone is used to take us to “the other side,” the appearance of said current technology comes across as all too labored.
Gil Kenan is a fantastic director, and there’s no doubt that he lends his version of “Poltergeist” a handful of exciting visual flourishes. His take on an ominous tree attack is scary and beautifully executed. Likewise, his aforementioned trip into the “other side” is eerily effective. If only there was a substantial build behind any of this stuff. Sadly, there’s very little building of tension here, and that makes for a movie experience that feels like it’s over before anything truly happens. Even Burke’s connection to the Bowen family feels undercooked, making for a grandiose final act character moment that feels completely unearned.
Such a shame, because in addition to a wonderful visual style, Kenan had a terrific cast at his disposal. Rockwell and DeWitt make every effort to bring Craig T. Nelson/JoBeth Williams-level humanity to this picture, and for the most part, they succeed. Likewise, Catlett is terrific here, and in a welcome twist, his frightened Griffin commits the greatest act of heroism in this picture. Again though, if only these characters were given more time to develop. Instead, these wonderful actors are saddled with an impatient “cut-to-the-chase” script.
It’s not that this “Poltergeist” is all out bad, but the fact that there’s so much squandered potential makes the proceedings tougher to endure. For all the moments that work, there are a handful of moments that don’t work, and some of the elements that are clearly designed to scare end up failing because they are completely over-thought. Take for instance, the use of clowns. The clown in the original “Poltergeist” was terrifying because it was just a clown. That’s scary enough. The clown in this picture is overtly creepy-looking to begin with, and that’s why, for my money, it fails to scare.
Even for those who’ve never seen the original “Poltergeist,” you’re very likely to find this movie derivative of something like “Insidious,” an effective spook alley picture that directly borrowed its DNA from the 80s masterwork. For snobby purists like me (yes, I freely admit it), this is simply a reminder of why certain movies shouldn’t be remade… or re-imagined… or whatever the hell you want to call it. I said it before, and I’ll say it again: if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
