Stay calm during the holidays and be successful with new year’s resolutions
Holiday times can be joyous but often challenging. It is best to go into them with an open heart as well as open eyes and ears in order to stay calm during the holidays and be successful with new year’s resolutions. “Perspective” and “presence” are two helpful “P” words to remember when going through challenging times. Seeing difficulties as gifts for growth is a great perspective shift. There are rich opportunities to practice the art of mindfulness during the holidays.
The sparkling lights, aromas of baking, tastes of delectable treats, multitudes of textures and melodic music engage our senses allowing us to drop into presence. Music and lyrics can bring us insight and comfort this time of year. Think of the Christmas song, “Oh Holy Night”: The words are especially poignant as they describe the night of Jesus’ birth and how humanity regained hope as “the soul felt its worth. A thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices. For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.” The song implores us to be humble: “fall on your knees, oh hear the angels’ voices.” It is asking us to take the time to listen and connect with our own divinity. It ends with “oh night divine, oh night divine.”
Maybe you’re not religious, but still the song has an important message: Remember the innocent baby that has the power to heal the world. We are all that innocent beautiful baby. In our humanness and in our very souls, we are all connected. We all have that spark of the divine somewhere within us.
Navigating relationships during the holidays
When we judge or when we are critical of those we love, we’re disconnected from them. When we choose to focus on good qualities and love, we reconnect. Blame and criticism are major causes for the breakup of marriages. When we blame and criticize, it serves to increase negative energy and perpetuates the negative behavior. It’s OK to speak up when we’re hurt. But we need to do it in a way that’s not blaming or critical.
Choose to be in the mode of creating what you want, not complaining about what you don’t have. It’s more empowering to create the life you want than to keep getting stuck in emotional reactions. When talking to your loved ones, think first about the outcome you want and then start the talk. When you keep the vision of the outcome you want, you’re more likely not to stray off course. You may have to make a conscious effort to come back to your true goals of the conversation, but just keep at it.
We often get caught up in our emotions and sometimes they get big real fast, kind of like froth on a mug of beer: They can be big, but they’re just full of a lot of air! If we keep the vision in mind of what we’re trying to create, we can usually stay on track. We want to go into the new year in the spirit of creating the life we want. Focusing on creating and not complaining is one way to stay calm during the holidays and be successful with New Year’s resolutions.
Imagine you are a brightly lit cottage
Imagine yourself as a brightly lit cottage surrounded by mysterious woods. Your big, welcoming front porch is ready to greet the big unknown of the new year. It’s important to maintain the integrity of the cottage and not let the woods encroach too far or you may get swallowed up. You want to live in balance with your surroundings, enjoying the give and take of nature. Your brightly lit porch will attract others, but make sure they are contributing to your light and not diminishing it. As you venture into the new year, take time to reflect on the people and activities in which you have chosen to surround yourself. Make sure they are in alignment with your highest goals.
Core strength for body, mind, and soul
We all have the potential to be filled with positive light. A beautiful visualization is to imagine light filling your core. Breathe in this lovely light up through your spinal column on out through the top of your head, and then exhale back down through the root chakra at the end of the spinal column. We can see ourselves getting stronger as we envision ourselves filling with this divine light. It’s a very relaxing meditation.
Our strength comes from our cores. Martial artists and fitness trainers put emphasis on developing core strength. But spiritual and emotional strength also emanate from our cores. We can use meditation, visualization, and fitness techniques to strengthen our cores, facilitating vitality in mind, body and spirit. Especially around the holidays, when expectations from family, friends and ourselves are heightened, we need to use self-management tools to stay calm during the holidays and be successful with new year’s resolutions. Tools can include meditation, prayer, visualization, physical movement, writing, creative arts therapy, social or support groups, reflection, and planning or taking steps towards future goals.
The third “P” word is patience
The adage, “patience is a virtue,” is one of the most valuable truths we can hone. Albert Einstein said, “It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” Those who don’t give up certainly seem to have the upper edge on success and happiness. This goes for business, relationships, projects, behaviors, meditation, and anything, really. New year’s resolutions or habits you are trying to kick or create can benefit from the practice of patience. The key is to keep practicing patience in order to develop more patience. Due to neuroplasticity, the brain is wired to adapt to whatever habits you continually practice. Practice truly pays off when your goal is to stay calm during the holidays and be successful with new year’s resolutions.
Abraham Lincoln said, “I may be a slow walker, but I never walk backwards.” If we are going forth in the direction of our dreams, we can breathe easy. So take a deep breath and enjoy presence and presents!
