Written by Crystal Schwalger
So I woke up this morning to one of life’s best practical jokes…a pimple right next to my lower lip. Not just ANY pimple, NO, it was very noticeable, and very painful. Not only that, it had decided to take its own sweet time coming to a complete head because it wants everyone to wonder what that huge mountain is doing on my face.
I suppose I could just think of it as a left- over from puberty, only I went through puberty a LONG time ago. Or I guess I could chalk it up to dreaming that my body just hasn’t recognized that I am aging and thinks that I am still young. The only problem with that scenario is that it can’t be the case, since my hair and face has no problem announcing to the world I’m getting older by mass producing fine lines and gray hairs faster than you can say Nice and Easy.
I hear all the time how people say life is so unfair…really? Do you want to know what is really unfair? Try sporting wrinkles, noticeably graying hair, and still getting almost as many pimples as my 9th grader. Is this some kind of cosmic twisted joke or something? I can handle a wrinkle or two, and even manage a few gray hairs here and there with Nice and Easy, but I am SO over pimples. Over…WAY over! As in, I should NEVER have to worry about getting pimples again, over it. What’s next universe? Hot flashes and night sweats with an extra dose of acne thrown in for good measure?
Why didn’t anyone tell us that it is never ending? At least we could have been prepared. On the other hand, I guess I understand not telling a poor 14 year old the bad news. It would have sounded something like this: “Sorry to tell you this Susie, but guess what…get used to your pimples because your body is going to make them until you die!” Talk about a letdown. How horrible would it be to have heard that? I guess I can sympathize. Still, it really is not fair! You want to know what else is not fair, Aging. Yeah, aging, the getting older and wiser bit.
I’m not going to lie, aging sucks! Some people I’m told, age gracefully, embracing their age and everything that comes with it. Yeah, well, I don’t think so. I plan to fight it as much as I can. Getting wrinkles and graying hair is no fun. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve earned them, every single one of them. In fact, I could probably point out to you which gray hairs I earned from which of my children. They didn’t know they were doing this to me at the time of course, and to be honest, neither did I till I looked in the mirror and wondered, What the hell happened?
I do have to say though; I don’t regret anything, the good, the bad, and even the ornery. The getting up every two hours to feed each one of my babies, who all refused to sleep though the night because they thought they would starve, the endless mounds of diapers, the sitting up all night rocking a sick child, or rubbing their legs to ease the growing pains. The visits to the emergency room, numerous broken bones, endless illnesses, the throwing up, and not to mention, peeing all over me, the driving lessons, sports practices, games, tournaments, the wins and even the losses. If all these things gave me graying hairs, I’m okay with it. Family and children are what life is all about.
Time is a funny thing. It really does slip through our fingers. The years with our children come and go. I once thought childhood would last forever. I couldn’t wait for their first word, their first step, and their first time doing everything. Now I look back and realize that instead of looking forward to their first everything, I should have been looking forward to their everything. Every smile, every cry, every laugh, every scraped knee, every picture covered in crayon, and every mud covered jersey.
They all came in a strange harmonic melody of life that somehow flowed over the years and washed into memories that I cherish. Where did the time go?
Now I have a new name that I actually love and embrace more than I ever thought I would, the name of grandma. I was a little unsure of that name at first. After all, when I heard the name grandma, pictures of old ladies came into my mind. Not exactly the way I wanted to see myself. Then I realized that I don’t have to be confined to looking like what I thought a grandma did. Just because I am old enough to be one, doesn’t mean I have to look like one. I can be the type of grandma that I choose to be. Today I have two adorable grandsons that give me so much joy, and I wouldn’t change being a grandma for anything.
In fact, I absolutely love telling people I am a grandma now. I love seeing their faces and hearing them say that I don’t look like I’m a grandma. Maybe it’s the light, or maybe they are just being nice. Who knows, maybe it’s the pimples erupting on my chin. Either way, I like hearing it, since it makes getting older just a little bit sweeter. I can smile and tell them, “Yes, I really am a grandma.”
I can embrace who I am now. I take the aching joints, the fine lines and even the grey hairs that I color, and don’t let them define who I am, or what I can be. The singer songwriter Bob Dylan had a song title that sums up how I feel about life, “The Times, they Are A Changin’.” Let’s just hope that includes no more pimples, because I really, really don’t want them anymore.
Crystal Schwalger has loved writing ever since she could remember. Her love of learning led her to Dixie State University where she graduated with a degree in English and Communications. She is passionate about writing and believes that you should never give up on your dreams. She is happiest when she is at home enjoying her backyard green spaces with her family. She currently lives in Washington Utah with her husband, her children, and her dog Kali.
