cartoon Rahm EmanuelFrom cartoonist Clay Jones about “Rahma Lama Ding Dong,” Jones’s conservative friend who isn’t a jerk, and why Rahm Emanuel is Democrats’ worst nightmare.

A few years ago, I was debating a friend who is a conservative. Really. I have a friend who is conservative. He’s a really good friend too, and I don’t consider him a jerk at all. I think he’s wrong on everything and the feelings are mutual, but none of that’s a reason for me to overlook that he’s an awesome guy. During our friendly argument, I bashed some Republicans for exhibiting modern Republican behavior, which is just terrible stuff. He pointed out that the Democrats have Rahm Emanuel. It was a really good counter point.

Republicans don’t have Jack Kemps anymore. They have Ted Cruz. And yes, when you say “Ted Cruz,” you can let that “ooze” sound linger at the end of his name.

Cruz might be the worst person sliming through politics right now, and Republicans are owning him. Though there are some who really can’t stand the guy.

Cruz’s college freshman roommate, Craig Mazin, said “I would rather have anybody else be the president of the United States. Anyone. I would rather pick somebody from the phone book.” He really doesn’t like Cruz. He later said “I want to be clear because Ted Cruz is a nightmare of a human being. I have plenty of problems with his politics but truthfully his personality is so awful that 99 percent of why I hate him is just his personality. If he agreed with me on every issue, I would have him only one percent less.

One colleague who worked with Cruz on the Bush 200 campaign said “Why do people take such an instant dislike to Ted Cruz? It just saves time.”

George W. Bush, his former boss who refused to give him a White House job said “I just don’t like the guy.”

His senate colleagues can’t stand him. One thing that hurts is the life-size oil painting Cruz keeps of himself. That’s creepy.

On top of all that you probably can’t name one thing he’s done for Texas since becoming a senator.

Craig Mazin, who had to field complaints about Cruz creeping the women’s halls in his bathrobe, sums it up best with “One thing Ted Cruz is really good at: uniting people who otherwise disagree about everything else in a total hatred of Ted Cruz.”

Cruz is the guy who told a 3-year-old girl that her “world was on fire” at a campaign event.

Cruz is that guy who, when you see him approaching, you just go “ew.”

After Cruz, you have charmers the likes of Mike Huckabee and Carly Fiorina, and of course we can’t forget Donald Trump.

Rahm Emanuel is the Democrat who Democrats don’t want to own.

Rahm is a huge disaster. His appointment as Obama’s chief of staff is probably the president’s worst political decision. I’m sure Obama was happy for Rahm to run for mayor of Chicago as it got him out of D.C. While chief of staff, Rahm would confront congressmen in the showers. Yes. Confronted by a buck-ass naked Rahm Emanuel. That’s possibly creepier than Cruz skulking dormitories in a towel.

Rahm is more of a political manager like Karl Rove than a leader, which doesn’t work for the position of mayor, especially in a major city.

Rahm fought against Freedom of Information Act requests by The Chicago Tribune, claiming it was a burden. He then deleted the emails they wanted. Rahm either doesn’t get that being sleazy is very apparent in a city like Chicago or thinks he has to be sleazy to be mayor of Chicago.

Emanuel is accused of allowing the police to get away with using excessive force on African Americans. In the Laquan McDonald’s shooting, his administration withheld the dashboard camera video of the shooting for 18 months, possibly to help with his reelection. The city paid the family $5 million dollars before there was even a lawsuit, which many consider an effort to keep them quiet during a reelection campaign. The city also resisted charging the cop for over 18 months. The video was only released because a judge ordered it.

What happens when there’s a cover-up? Heads roll. In this case, the head belonged to the chief of police. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that this occurs while there are calls for the mayor to resign.

So I guess it works like this: For every 100 disgusting Republicans, there’s one disgusting Democrat.

claytoonz.com/2015/12/05/rahma-lama-ding-dong

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2 COMMENTS

  1. Well … you’re completely right about Cruz and you’re right that Rahm can’t be trusted to tell you if it’s raining or not … but there is a possible justification for Rahm’s cover-up that doesn’t actually involve his re-election.
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    I use the word “possible” because Rahm and nobody around him would ever admit that it’s true.
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    Think back to when the McDonald shooting actually took place 13 months ago. (You wrote “18 months” … proofread, proofread, proofread). Ferguson was being destroyed by street riots … and there was plenty of justification for shooting Michael Brown but nobody there was in a mood to listen. (They’re still not … but that’s a different argument.) What if the video of the shooting of McDonald had come out then? The great Chicago Fire might have looked like a marshmallow roast in comparison.
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    It could well be that Rahm saved Chicago by covering it up until it could be released at a time when enough people recognized that violence in the street was the wrong strategy. Such is the fruit of living in a nation divided.
    .
    But I like your style!

  2. You are correct and I was wrong. It was. 13 months. I own that.

    Your theory on why there was a delay the video makes a lot of sense. So that can’t be why there was a delay.

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