Mary Tyler Moore Show
Sheltering In Place by Bruce Plante, Tulsa World

Who Can Turn the World ON With Her Anniversary?

Tyrades! by Danny Tyree

What were you doing the night of Saturday, March 19, 1977?

Like 21.2 million other Americans, I was watching the final episode of “The Mary Tyler Moore Show.” Watching it and making a nerdy audio recording of it for posterity. Sure, I didn’t anticipate the cassette keepsake having such an eardrum-assaulting HUM on it, but at least I felt like I was a part of something historic. And maybe I should use the tape’s hum even today to drown myself out when I spontaneously start singing, “It’s a long way to Tipperary, it’s a long way to go…”

But I’m getting ahead of myself. The 50th anniversary of the premiere of the show is coming up on September 19. Even though the late Moore was already famous for playing Laura Petrie on “The Dick Van Dyke Show,” who could have guessed when she bumped “Petticoat Junction” from the CBS Saturday night schedule that her eponymous sitcom would last for seven seasons, spawn three spinoffs, provide a template for future workplace comedies, garner 29 Emmy Awards and make a sex symbol out of Ed Asner? (Okay, four of five ain’t bad.)

Moore’s character (liberated thirtysomething Mary Richards) dated – but she was an inspiration to countless girls and young women who chose to focus on their careers and self-actualization rather than settling down with the first Prince Charming who would “rescue” them. After umpteen dateless nights in high school and college, I was starting to think that not only Mary Richards but also Jane Jetson, Ethel Mertz, Phyllis Diller, Morticia Addams and Miss Nancy on “Romper Room” were inspiring girls to make me a low priority. (“As soon as I’ve made a million dollars in my career watching paint dry, maybe you can take me out.”)

I don’t know that I was fully conscious of the influence at the time, but in retrospect, I’m sure the gang in the fictional WJM TV newsroom had an impact on my majoring in broadcast journalism in college. (Of course, that was only after I couldn’t find a university with a doctorate program in “Movin’ on up to the east side, to a deluxe apartment in the sky…”)

The writing on “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” was smart, sophisticated and socially relevant. And it’s a blessing that we have reruns preserved in amber on Hulu, so we don’t have to harbor pointless dreams of a remake. Do we really need to hear “The F-word’s all around, no need to waste it” or see a jubilant Mary toss a Molotov cocktail instead of her tam into the air? Would we want Chuckles the Clown coming back to life and writing a bestseller about his visit to heaven? (“A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your…er, gown.”)

Highly promoted series finales have become standard now. But when “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” ended, it joined “The Fugitive” as one of the few shows that offered closure to loyal viewers. All those shows featuring castaways, genies, nose-twitching witches, Martian uncles and caped crusaders just ended unceremoniously. Of course, maybe that’s a blessing. (“Wiiiillllbuuuurrr – Soylent Green is horses!”)

Thank you for reading this far in my ramblings. You’re gonna make it after all…oh no! The dreaded last-paragraph drift to the crossword puzzle!

I hope there’s no clue for “pluck, spirit, mettle.” I HATE spunk!

Copyright 2020 Danny Tyree. Danny welcomes email responses at tyreetyrades@aol.com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.”


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Danny Tyree
Controversial author Harlan Ellison once described the work of Danny Tyree as "wonkily extrapolative" and said Tyree's mind "works like a demented cuckoo clock." Ellison was speaking primarily of Tyree’s 1983-2000 stint on the "Dan T’s Inferno" column for “Comics Buyer’s Guide” hobby magazine, but the description would also fit his weekly "Tyree’s Tyrades" column for mainstream newspapers. Inspired by Dave Barry, Al "Li'l Abner" Capp, Lewis Grizzard, David Letterman, and "Saturday Night Live," "Tyree's Tyrades" has been taking a humorous look at politics and popular culture since 1998. Tyree has written on topics as varied as Rent-A-Friend.com, the Lincoln bicentennial, "Woodstock At 40," worm ranching, the Vatican conference on extraterrestrials, violent video games, synthetic meat, the decline of soap operas, robotic soldiers, the nation's first marijuana café, Sen. Joe Wilson’s "You lie!" outburst at President Obama, Internet addiction, "Is marriage obsolete?," electronic cigarettes, 8-minute sermons, early puberty, the Civil War sesquicentennial, Arizona's immigration law, the 50th anniversary of the Andy Griffith Show, armed teachers, "Are women smarter than men?," Archie Andrews' proposal to Veronica, 2012 and the Mayan calendar, ACLU school lawsuits, cutbacks at ABC News, and the 30th anniversary of the death of John Lennon. Tyree generated a particular buzz on the Internet with his column spoofing real-life Christian nudist camps. Most of the editors carrying "Tyree’s Tyrades" keep it firmly in place on the opinion page, but the column is very versatile. It can also anchor the lifestyles section or float throughout the paper. Nancy Brewer, assistant editor of the "Lawrence County (TN) Advocate" says she "really appreciates" what Tyree contributes to the paper. Tyree has appeared in Tennesee newspapers continuously since 1998. Tyree is a lifelong small-town southerner. He graduated from Middle Tennessee State University in 1982 with a bachelor's degree in Mass Communications. In addition to writing the weekly "Tyree’s Tyrades," he writes freelance articles for MegaBucks Marketing of Elkhart, Indiana. Tyree wears many hats (but still falls back on that lame comb-over). He is a warehousing and communications specialist for his hometown farmers cooperative, a church deacon, a comic book collector, a husband (wife Melissa is a college biology teacher), and a late-in-life father. (Six-year-old son Gideon frequently pops up in the columns.)

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