Thursday, May 9, 2024
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Will Durst

    Will Durst’s opinion pieces hosted by The Independent.

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    If you had to pick one of the 20 debate-qualified Democratic candidates to have a beer with, who would it be?

    Democrats you’d have a blank with

    Will Durst -
    The second week of September is traditionally when Congress reconvenes. We here at Durstco are proud to present “How Congress spent summer vacation.”

    How Congress spent summer vacation

    Will Durst -
    After the Mueller Report, Democrats wilted like freshly cut lilies placed in the back of a Mustang at the Wisconsin State Fair the second week of August.

    The Mueller Report: An FAQ

    Will Durst -
    President Donald Trump loves him some wall. He even said opponents can name it "peaches." So Peaches the Wall it is.

    Peaches the Wall

    Will Durst -
    If the first round of Democratic Party debates were distilled into five words or less, it would be Ambien Thunderdome. They came, they saw, they slept.

    An Ambien Thunderdome

    Will Durst -
    Scholars think that the first word was either "ouch" or "me," although "pie" had to have been up there since the shapes surely reminded the Sumerians of it.

    The best words

    Will Durst -
    One of the highlights of Festivus is the "airing of grievances," which I believe is a worthwhile real-life exercise at least once a year.

    The airing of grievances

    Will Durst -
    The FBI arrested 33 rich parents accused of trying to buy their kids' admission to prestigious universities through nefarious means

    Rich is as rich does

    Will Durst -
    The State of the Donald address, I mean The State of the Union address, is about to be presented by President Donald Trump.

    The State of the Donald address

    Will Durst -
    Strap on your seat belts extra tight, everybody. This nation is stuck on a rollercoaster of spin with a minimum of two years before we can get off.

    America is stuck on a rollercoaster of spin

    Will Durst -
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